Now I’ve only been pregnant once so maybe it’s a matter of personal opinion, but here’s what I’ve found are the best and worst things you can say to a pregnant woman. And I had to add some of my favorites from things friends said after I had Jules. Hee hee hee. Enjoy!

Here we go boys and girls! Take notes…

Yes:

You’re glowing!

You look beautiful!

You look great!

You’re carrying pregnancy so well!

You’re rocking pregnancy, mama!

No:

Can I touch your belly?!

* Your tummy is SO small!

* You’re barely showing!

* You’re SO BIG!

* You look like you’re ready to pop!

You need to take this birthing class... you should take this parenting class... 

I’d be so anxious and nervous about labor if I were you!

Ew. Labor freaks me out!

That [other pregnant] lady’s tummy is so little compared to yours!

** In Nicaragua, we eat pork soup for a healthy pregnancy. You must get this soup, otherwise your baby will suffer.

*** Let me show you some laboring techniques. You spread your legs like this. Now breathe... 

* Sounds weird, I know. But I want my tummy to be prefect, not small and not big. It means the baby is growing perfectly and if I’m told that I'm barely showing or huge, paranoia tells me he’s not! Even if "small" seems like a compliment, it's probably better to not comment on a pregnant woman's size at all. 

** Someone actually said this to me. This goes for any custom that believes you will suffer greatly if you don't eat what they recommend.

*** Does this really need an explanation?!

And finally, what not to say to your friend who just had a baby (especially if you’re a non-parent):

Want to go out for dinner tonight with me and the girls?! 

I’m so tired! I only got 7 hours of sleep last night. Boo.

And this gem: OMG. Is your vagina OK?!

Any foot-in-mouth moments to share from men and non-birthing ladies? For mamas and papas, please chime in on things you loved and hated hearing during your & your partner's pregnancy journey! Let's laugh through it together!