Two Effortless Practices to Feel Happy and Avoid Comparing
A good friend told me today that she’s unfollowing someone on Instagram because it hurts too much to see her posts. Traveling to exotic places, kicking ass in athletics, a successful career… my heart hurt thinking that someone else’s happiness causes another’s sadness or insecurity.
Social media has a funny way of affecting us. She's just posting what she’s inspired by and what she thinks others will be inspired by.
I’m guilty of rolling my eyes after someone posted “Portugal, Spain or the Maldives… where to have my next dream vacation... sigh!” I’m happy that he's living his dream but it felt like boasting. Either way, it seems like whether it’s an authentic-share or a look-at-me-share, the risk on the receiving end is the same. We can feel negative about it if we're in that space.
At the end of the day, we’re all trying to be interesting and live an interesting life. And what that really comes down to is striving to be liked, wanted, heard, validated, significant, admired, etc. Why does it hurt to see others on the path to finding or proving their significance? Go ahead and de-friend or unfollow if it’s bringing you down. Maybe even give yourself a social media break.
Let’s stop judging ourselves by another's carefully edited life in social media. A well thought-out sentence, a planned story, a picture from a good angle or a pretty-filter.
Two practices that help me focus on my own happiness and avoid getting caught in comparison:
1) Monthly goals: helps me remember what I want my life to look like vs. be tempted by someone else’s that looks good online.
2) Writing highlights and victories in my journal everyday. This specific practice has been life changing.
Let's continue sharing as it feels good and authentic. People are going to judge (we all do to some degree) and we can’t stop someone else from processing in a way that makes them feel uncomfortable. On that note, when we see something that makes us feel uncomfortable, remember it’s just that person’s form of self-expression. Look back at your goals and victories, and work harder toward your version of your kick ass life.
Be proud of yourself for your accomplishments, your wit, your creativity and humor. Let others have fun and fluff their feathers if they want to. And give yourself permission to join the feather fluffing if you're inspired to ;)
Love you guys!