How I managed Anxiety During Pregnancy
I’ve started writing this post at least five times. I went into detail about the various triggers that sparked my anxiety throughout my second pregnancy: dad’s ER visits and extended hospital stays, my neighborhood catching on fire and evacuating through what looked like Armageddon, extreme adverse reactions to altitude change, a fire in Julian’s bedroom closet… but no matter the level of detail I shared, something didn’t feel fully expressed.
I now realize that “something,” was that instead of sharing my anxiety, I want to share how I got through a period of high anxiety by identifying and utilizing healthy solutions that worked for me. Whether you’re a second+ time mom with a tight schedule, or a first-time mom with flexibility (or even a guy wanting to offer empathy and support), I hope you can find something here that brings lightness and a sense of ease. And now that we’re in a global pandemic, I hope everyone can find something here to help them deal with their anxiety and stress. Coincidentally, almost everything below can be done in the comfort of your own home.
1. I drank lots and lots of water – I know we’re supposed to drink a lot of water when we’re pregnant but I’d often ask myself if I was feeling antsy because I was dehydrated. Whether or not there’s a scientific correlation, the moment I took care of that basic need I felt more at ease.
2. I watched Step Brothers – I’m a Will Ferrell fan and I endlessly quote his movies. The first time I saw it, I stopped the movie halfway through because I thought it was “ridiculous,” and almost returned it to Blockbuster (yes, it’s been a favorite for that long). Curiosity got the best of me, so I finished it and it instantly became a favorite, reliable for a good laugh every time. I had an anxiety attack when I received the epidural and after I was able to calm myself, I watched Step Brothers and it lifted me up instantly.
3. Please don’t judge, I sipped wine – not a lot of wine, literally a few sips of red wine loosened my chest and allowed me to access the mental space to use my other tools when I was in a panic-state. (My doctor said it was okay at that stage in my pregnancy, so check with your doctor before trying this yourself.)
4. I practiced yoga – while I only did prenatal yoga three times during my second pregnancy, I was able to practice it a few times a week with my first (what a difference when you’re a second time mom). Making that space in my body absolutely helped keep my mind calm and I strongly recommend it. Since we’re all social distancing, YogaGlo has great online sessions – or better yet, support your local business and see if your yoga studio is offering online classes with your favorite teacher. @teddymcdonald is an awesome Malibu yoga instructor and started an Instagram live session this morning!
5. I became a fish – I also highly attribute swimming to my mental health. I had no idea I was such a swimmer and worked my way up to swimming 36 laps, on my 36th birthday, during my 36th week of pregnancy. I should have bought a lotto ticket that day ;).
6. I meditated – anytime my chest started to tighten, I opened my meditation app, closed my eyes, took a few deep breaths and started to ground myself. Whether just a couple of minutes or an hour, it helped me relax tremendously. I’m triggered by claustrophobia, so I made some guided meditations available offline when I traveled on small planes or, God forbid, I got stuck in an elevator. Headspace worked best for me and it has a plethora of meditations to deal with real-life circumstances.
7. “We’re going streaking! We're going up the quad and to the gymnasium!” (I told you I reference Will Ferrell movies) – well, not really streaking, but I regularly stripped down to a tank top and underwear at night on my balcony, allowing my body temperature to drop from the cool air. Sometimes, I paced back and forth, taking deep breaths while saying a mantra. Other times, I stared at the moon and focused on the stars, while whispering words of gratitude. I asked various spirits and ancestors for assistance. To this day, the moon and starry night sky is something that calms and soothes me immensely. I find it so soothing, that on my balcony under the stars is where I go to in any guided meditation as my “place of comfort.” I didn’t realize that connecting with nature was so key for me until I started doing this.
8. I got moving – during the evacuation, I woke up countless times each night, wondering where the hell I was, and scared of the “nightmare” I just had. Except the nightmare wasn’t just a dream, we were evacuated and our neighborhood was on fire. People's lives were at risk. The moment my mind started to spin, and before full on anxiety would kick in, I went to the bathroom and danced wildly to a favorite song (Vivir Mi Vida by Mark Anthony or Hooked on A Feeling by Blue Swede). It just wasn’t possible for me to have anxiety while singing my heart out and dancing so freely.
Pregnancy itself was a trigger for me, since I struggled with claustrophobia. I don’t know what I would have done without these tools and I’m so grateful to have identified them. If you’re experiencing anxiety during pregnancy, try making a list of things that you know help you get through it. You know yourself best, you know what you need. Sometimes, it’s just a matter of identifying the triggers, finding solutions, and using your tools before things get out of control. Share that list with your partner. Make time for these things in your calendar. Make the list the screensaver on your phone. Do what you need to do so you’re reminded of it constantly.
My wish in sharing with you is to offer hope (HOLD ON, PAIN ENDS) – to offer examples of healthy ways I managed my anxiety during a time when my body was exhausted, my physical and mental energy was drained, and there were countless triggers. I also wish for the rest of your pregnancy to be as uneventful and smooth as possible.
Please feel free to reach out to me in the comments section below if you’d like to share your stories about experiencing and reducing anxiety. We’re all in this together. Let this pandemic unite us – even if that means from 6’ away, through phone calls, FaceTime, and virtual hugs.
Sending big virtual hugs,
Jess